Bike Sex

A Scottish man named Robert Stewart was caught having sex with his bicycle by housekeeping in his bedroom at the Aberley House Hostel in Ayr. Being very supportive of sexual exploration, I think that three years probation is a little much for this drunken hookup. I mean c'mon, he was just kickin back in the privacy of his own hostel room and drinkin some brews. The next thing you know, the bike is calling him a bitch and saying he doesn't know how to please a bike. A man has got to defend his honor, and most importantly, his skills at sexual bike gratification. Believe me, I understand. If someone broke into to my house while I was having sex with my guitar and arrested me, there'd be a serious price to pay. Hmm, maybe I should go out more...

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